darrynek: rneerkat: if somebody invented a shirt with a giant pocket in the front they would be millionaires because who wouldnt want to feel like a kangaroo
shutupmerlin: My grandmother grew up in this tiny village in Barbados, and she was the only kid in the village to have a cricket bat. She used to play with all the boys, but then they started stealing the bat every time she bought it out of the house and saying that she couldn’t play because girls shouldn’t play sport. So one day she invited them to come play cricket, then set fire to the bat...
shavingryansprivates: i still dont understand how people have the association of sex = morals like i just dont understand how you connect the two
sadness is some shit lemme tell u son:... →
usb-toaster: one cubic centimeter of brain tissue is home to more neural connections than there are stars in the milky way; that war should sometimes erupt between them is not possible so much as it is inevitable and it’s important to remember this the next time your mind decides to…
kawaii-santa-chan: kawaii-santa-chan: kawaii-santa-chan: there is no teacher in my history class rn and we are all just sitting here and being really quiet and whenever somebody opens the door, everyone turns around because we think its a sub but its not and then we just shush whoever walks in update: we’re taking attendance and sending it down so nobody suspects that we dont have a...
funkycops: the original pokemon were so cool. plant with feet. pile of eggs. slime that turns into bigger slime. other plant with feet
sherlockedbyphaninthetardis: davedirk: davedirk: lauraforgood: m33wlin: WE WERE WATCHING THIS MOVIE IN GYM AND THE MAIN CHARACTER WAS LIKE “I’M TIRED AND HUNGRY AND HORNY” AND ME AT THIS OTHER CUTE GUY IN THE BACK JUST BOTH GO “SAME” AND LOOK AT EACH OTHER AND I WINKED AND EVERYONE WAS SO UNCOMFORTABLE BUT I WAS LAUGHING REALLY HARD AND THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE FRIENDS can we have a...
hungarian: it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
ginocchia: boyfriend: come here just a moment please me: ok bf: undress me: ok then he covered me with olive oil, gave me an orgasm using his fingers and went back to play guitar
potatoandotherwise: the first person to have a boner must have been so confused like “why is my extra limb sticking out and why do I want someone to touch it”
500-days-of-hermit: Sometimes all you really want are some nudes
When I say, ‘I love you,’ it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have...– Joss Whedon (via winterkristall)
thegirl-inred: toned-tanned-fit-andready: v0nlaust: caliiforniadreaming-xo: gothicstan: localised: do you ever get the urge to get up in the middle of the night while everyone else is fast asleep and just walk places and to be completely alone and entirely dedicated to your thoughts yes but the problem is i dont want to get murdered u feel me i feel you we all feel you why...
partybarackisinthehousetonight: yes i’m very good in bed. excellent in bed. *props up pillows and folds blankets* *pillow falls over* uh *sweats nervously* this doesn’t usually happen i promise
I need a damn cigarette.
theonesock: garlic-breadgasm: YOU DON’T OWE YOUR PARENTS ANYTHING IT WAS THEIR CHOICE TO HAVE, KEEP AND RAISE YOU BUT IT WASN’T YOUR CHOICE TO BE THEIR CHILD ANY EXPECTATIONS OR IDEALS THEY TRY AND ENFORCE ON YOU ARE BULLSHIT IF YOU DO NOT AGREE WITH THEM THEY SHOULD ACCEPT THEIR CHILD AS THEY ARE NOT JUDGE THEM ON A MINOR DETAIL THAT DOESN’T AFFECT THEIR LIFE DO NOT FEEL BAD IF YOU AREN’T...
1: When did you lose your virginity?
2: Rough sex or soft sex?
3: Do you have any unusual kinks/fetishes?
4: Weirdest place you’ve had sex?
5: Favourite sex position?
6: Do you like to be dominant or submissive?
7: Have you ever had any one night stands?
8: Sex on the bed, couch or the floor?
9: Have you ever had sex in a public place?
10: Have you ever been caught masturbating?
11: What does your favourite sexy underwear look like?
12: How often do you have sex?
13: Is there anybody right now you’d like to have sex with?
14: Do you prefer giving or receiving oral sex?
15: Most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to you during sex?
16: A song you’d listen to during hard/rough/kinky sex?
17: A song you’d listen to during soft/slow/passionate sex?
18: Are you into dressing up for sex?
19: Would you prefer sex in the bath or sex in the shower?
20: If you could have sex with anyone right now, who would it be?
21: Have you ever had a threesome? If not, would you?
22: Do you/would you use sex toys?
23: Have you ever sent someone a dirty text/picture?
24: Would you have sex with your best friend?
25: Is there anything you do after sex? (for example, smoke, eat, drink)
26: Something that will never fail to get you horny?
27: Early morning sex or late night sex?
28: Favourite body part on the opposite sex?
29: Favourite body part on the same sex?
30: Do you watch porn?
Things You Didn't Know About Dreams →
i-am-unbr0k3n: cutting-but-recovering: steve-the-duck: wounded-nightengale: itswatsonbiches: monochromaticlovers: zbsiempre: helila: freak-on-speed: Ah so thats why I need to cuddle when I sleep, seeing as all of my dreams are fucked nightmares most of the time. I am afraid of what’s in my head, both while sleeping and awake, and sober or high (depending on the drug) “Children...
goddamnitmads: ethicalbutchering: fallenangelsinthetardis: Is it alright to ship the Sherlock fandom with the Hannibal fandom? Because what could possibly be better than a large group of psychopaths and high-functioning sociopaths teaming up with each other? It just fits. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_burn_centers_in_the_United_States
africans: i drop a piece of weed and it fell in a spider web and the spider was like “my nigga” and we fist pounded